via inside higher ed.

• The magazine Radar has just published a series of transcripts designed to show how the children of the rich and famous are catered to, even if they don’t deserve special treatment. The magazine had a writer pose as an assistant to various wealthy people, calling on behalf of their fictional offspring to see whether they would receive favorable treatment in landing a Congressional internship, or a book contract or ... some assistance from Wesleyan University’s admissions office. For lucky Wesleyan, the magazine posed as someone calling on behalf of Jake Quiznos, the (imaginary) heir to the Quiznos sub empire. When Jake’s representative tells the (unnamed) Wesleyan official that he’d like privacy on his tour, he’s assured that he can have a private tour by an admissions official who notes that “when Mr. Spielberg came to visit, I gave him the tour myself.” The admissions official says he’ll try to get time for Jake with the university’s president (possibly to discuss donations), and reassures Jake’s aide that the young Quiznos will have no problem finding vegan food on campus. Naturally, the Quiznos heir needed reassurance that he wouldn’t encounter a Subway on campus, and receives it. The Wesleyan official doesn’t appear concerned after being told of Jake’s low SAT scores (at least for Wesleyan), low grades, or “some shoplifting issues” that Jake’s assistant says are definitely in the past and are now just the subject of Jake’s poetry. Says the Wesleyan admissions official of these qualities: “I don’t think they necessarily disqualify him off the bat. Is this someone who’s able to show redemption? The admissions process is a very holistic process. We look at you from your grades to your recommendations to what you’ve shown that you’re capable of doing. We don’t see it as a one-factor kind of thing.” Asked about the magazine’s feature, a spokesman for Wesleyan told Inside Higher Ed Wednesday that the person who spoke to Radar was someone in the admissions office but declined to say who. The spokesman said that the person suspected the call might be a joke and “didn’t want to be rude” in his answers.

Meritocracy indeed.